• Ella

the Energetic Economy



I want to introduce a concept: that there is a currency and an economy that runs deeper than our financial economy and it is our economy of energy. This currency and exchange is all about the exchange of emotions and energy. 

Ultimately as we move into the New Earth, more and more what we will truly be looking at is how we exchange energy and emotions, as opposed to figures because what life is truly about is moving energy, as opposed to moving money

In my own journey into a deeper and deeper realisation of abundance, what I’ve discovered is that abundance truly is about the act of consistent perception shifting. 

It’s a journey from feeling deeply controlled in some way (whether that be by outside forces, by finances, relationships, etc.), through awareness of this, and ultimately into greater and greater self expression. 

My own personal journey has taken me from a reality of one truth to a greater and greater appreciation that there are many possible truths to be lived. 

And my journey of abundance? From feeling deeply held guilt, shame, and self-judgement for who I am to a deeper and deeper sense of belonging.

As that belonging has grown my energy exchanges have become easier, my relationships more vibrant and trusting, and I am truly more and more feeling abundantly supported by an ecosystem of relationships and life which surrounds me. 



The Beliefs of Our Society: Our Financial Mental Health


There has been a largely survival-based relationship on Earth in relationship to money. 

Although we have all had a desire to live the life of our dreams and passions, beliefs such as ‘art doesn’t pay’, ‘jobs will be difficult to find’, and 'stability is found through finding a stable job' dominate our consciousness often largely without us realising. 

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In my personal journey in relationship to money I found that I was drawing comparisons to my healing journey through the Mental Illness Psychosis. 

I found that I held many self-judgemental beliefs that showed me that I felt that because I didn’t have any money I had no value. I also carried this around in my body so largely money was a very sore topic for me - I’d find I’d have physical pain when I had to deal with numbers, figures, and ‘business’. 

I decided, though, to choose that I was simply at the beginning of shifting my energetic relationship to money from one where the topic caused me physical and emotional pain, to one where I felt free and exhilarated. 



As with my personal healing through Psychosis, my healing through my abundance fears were very much about choosing to believe beyond what I had been taught - I had been taught largely that life was simply about survival and compromising yourself for money was just a part of life. 



I have learned there truly is a universe beyond this place of survival crafted by harmony and by how you wish to uniquely create and carve your life.

The journey into abundance and to the realisation of this desired and crafted life, however, is one which took me deeply into facing my personal self-judgements, my guilt, and my feeling of shame. 

Over time, I learned that the only true stability is authenticity - being authentic and true to the life you truly wish to create and how you want to create it particularly when fears and doubts arise or you feel questioned by the world around you.

Remaining truly authentic to yourself and value system carries with it long term physical and emotional health and the greater well-being of your immediate family and inter-personal relationships.



My journey into a deeper realisation of abundance was one which caused me to truly believe in my belonging. I learned the most important thing I could do for myself over time was to choose to believe in my vision of a brighter life.


And step by step that ideal, crafted life has revealed itself as I have kept choosing to believe beyond my fears. 

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As with all things, my journey with abundance was not a fixed structure but a growing relationship over time. 


It was about respecting the disparity between that which I feared (not having a financial structure and stability) and that which I loved (finding complete financial freedom in the creation of my art) and that to move from a state of a largely fear-based mentality to one of abundance would take time, attentiveness, care, and self-belief.


I began my journey by the fear and belief that not having any money meant I didn’t have any value. I felt huge discomfort in my body at the thought of money and I attracted experiences from this place: I wasn’t able to witness opportunities, possibilities, possible connections, and often had to face feeling deeply unconnected as I found myself feeling ‘out of work’. 

At this time, I found myself also being around others who would reflect back to me how work was very difficult to come by and I should just get a ‘proper job’. 

Some part of me had to hold onto the belief that there was a reality beyond this one - that it was not only okay to believe that I would be financially supported to do what I love (make art and build a multi-media business for spiritual leaders & a New Earth) but that it was the best decision I could make for myself. 

At times this was a hard choice to make, though. I found I was often in a fight with my own self-judgement, projecting the ‘fear’ I would have no work into my ‘mirror of reality’, yet expecting a change. 


Change, as a result, seemed to be coming very very slowly. 


I found that the only way through this pain of self-judgement (fearing that I would be stuck in a financial hole for a long time) was to get curious about it, question it, and ultimately to allow myself to believe that in some way it was serving my most authentic way of earning money and creating supportive relationships. 


And my consistent curiousity has lead me to deeply understand why I wasn’t attracting my most ideal experiences.


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From self-blame and guilt to self-belonging - key experiences


Over many months I would be doing a large amount of energetic work (meditations, workshops, healings), and though there were little wins, I would often find that my desire to manifest money with 'ease and grace' would either not come to fruition or I would manifest a way to receive money that felt heavy, guilt-ridden, or draining (such as a loan).


I learned that from this vibrational place - although the ‘intention to manifest’ was there - the ‘truth of my belief’ at that time was that manifesting aligned money felt very very stressful and difficult and so I was, instead, attracting from a more guilt-ridden and anxiety ridden place. 

The universe was not discriminating - it was simply reflecting and responding to the energy I held at the time and how I felt about myself. 

I took ‘leap after leap’ into a deeper and deeper faith that although my growth seemed to be going slow and I was (largely) experiencing a reality of self-judgement - each ‘leap’ I made had to be bringing me closer and closer to that goal of feeling ease and grace in my body in relationship to manifesting abundance (in the form of a new house and easier finances). 


I was driven to take another leap - to begin couch surfing with supportive friends whilst I remained uncertain as to whether I would have a home anytime soon! 


Amazingly, the choice to trust in myself just enough, and leave a situation which held me in a feeling of deep self-judgement, allowed for enough energetic space for my dream home to come forward. 

I equate this energetic space to the allowance of physical space around me (frequent nature trips and loving homes), space in my mind and body to feel relief and so to lift my energy enough to receive the new dream home.


It was also that basically by that point the house felt close and I had to trust just that little bit more (I feel) to allow myself to receive it. 


Upon moving into the dream house I truly feel like I’m living within my own place of ‘self-belonging’. As I’m so in appreciation I’ve found my body feels hugely at ease and as I’ve asked for work I’ve found incredible and easy manifestations of aligned work: 

Within 30 minutes of moving in and requesting ‘work’ from the cosmos - I bumped into an old collaborator at a cafe who specialises in ‘cause-based’ film-making and by the next week we were working together.

I had the intuitive ‘hit’ that I would ‘receive a special opportunity’ and by the next day I found myself having the hit to contact a major publishing company and got straight through to the CEO who I’ve forwarded my CV toward! 

I had a meditation arise which supported me in ‘seeing’ the people I was here to work with receiving the message ‘we’ll find you.’ 




This is the Energetic Economy 


It is one that truly values the true exchange of currency occurring - the exchange of energetic or emotional currency. 

And our first point of contact with this economy? Our relationship with ourselves. 

I found that when I first turned awareness toward this journey I felt that my jobs, my work, or money had power over me. I was truly operating from a ‘survival-based’ mentality that to earn money to ‘stay alive’ I had to compromise my values - I had to compromise my sense of belonging or how I truly preferred to be earning money. 

As I became more and more conscious of being influenced by society’s perspectives where beliefs such as ‘a stable job is the only form of stability’ are pervasive, I began to become aware that the only true stability comes from within - it comes from me remaining authentic to my true desires, my true feeling of value, my true sense of belonging, and how I truly wish to be carving and creating my life. 

All other forms of ‘stability’ (as a ‘stable job) are illusory as they are temporary. 

Through being truly authentic to your personal sense of self-expression, self-belonging, and how you truly wish to be carving and creating your life you find where true stability lies - in feeling good about your life and your sense of self.